Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Personalities and temperaments

Now that I can't drink because of my Alpha 1 antitrypsin deficiency..can't be bothered to explain it- google it, I am spending my drinking time ( yeah right) reading about personalities and temperaments. Elaine started me off by talking about learning styles and then about the 4 personality types. Having done some tests online and read a few books, it looks like I am Melancholy/phlegmatic.
Your personality is Melancholy Phlegmatic

Melancholy Strength:9 Weakness:15

Phlegmatic Strength:7 Weakness:4

Sanguine Strength:4 Weakness:0

Choleric Strength:0 Weakness:1

Weakness of a Melancholy

The Introvert | The Thinker | The Pessimist
The Melancholy's Emotions
Remembers the negatives
Moody and depressed
Enjoys being hurt
Has false humility
Off in another world
Low self-image
Has selective hearing
Too introspective
Guilt feelings
Persecution complex
Tends to hypochondria
The Melancholy As A Parent
Puts goals beyond reach
May discourage children
May be too meticulous
Becomes martyr
Sulks over disagreements
Puts guilt upon children
The Melancholy At Work
Not people oriented
depressed over imperfections
Chooses difficult work
Hesitant to start projects
Spends to much time planning
Prefers analysis to work
Hard to please
Standards often to high
Deep need for approval
The Melancholy As a Friend
Lives through others
Insecure socially
Withdrawn and remote
critical of others
Holds back affections
Dislikes those in opposition
Suspicious of people
Antagonistic and vengeful
Full of contradictions
Skeptical of compliments

Strengths of a Melancholy

The Introvert | The Thinker | The Pessimist
The Melancholy's Emotions
Deep and thoughtfully
Serious and purposeful
Genius prone
Talented and creative
Artistic or musical
Philosophical and poetic
appreciative of beauty
Sensitive to others
The Melancholy As A Parent
Sets high standards
Wants everything done right
Keeps home in good order
Picks up after children
Sacrifices own will for others
Encourages scholarship and talent
The Melancholy At Work
Schedule oriented
Perfectionist, high standards
Detail conscious
Persistent and thorough
Orderly and organized
Neat and tidy
Sees the problems
Finds creative solutions
Needs to finish what he starts
Likes charts, graphs, figures, lists
The Melancholy As a Friend
Makes friends cautiously
Content to stay in background
Avoids causing attention
Faithful and devoted
Will listen to complaints
Can solve other's problems
Deep concern for other people
Moved to tears with compassion
Seeks ideal mate

Weaknesses of a Phlegmatic

The Introvert | The Watcher | The Pessimist
The Phlegmatic's Emotions
Fearful and worried
Avoids responsibility
Quiet will of iron
To shy and reticent
Too compromising
The Phlegmatic As A Parent
Lax on discipline
Doesn't organize home
Takes life to easy
The Phlegmatic At Work
Not goal oriented
Lacks self motivation
Hard to get moving
Resents being pushed
Lazy and careless
Discourages others
Would rather watch
The Phlegmatic As a Friend
Dampens enthusiasm
Stays uninvolved
Is not exciting
Indifferent to plans
Judges others
Sarcastic and teasing
Resists change

Strengths of a Phlegmatic

The Introvert | The Watcher | The Pessimist
The Phlegmatic's Emotions
Low-key personality
Easygoing and relaxed
Calm, cool and collected
Patient well balanced
Consistent life
Quiet but witty
Sympathetic and kind
Keeps emotions hidden
Happily reconciled to life
All-purpose person
The Phlegmatic As A Parent
Makes a good parent
Takes time for the children
Is not in a hurry
Can take the good with the bad
Doesn't get upset easily
The Phlegmatic At Work
Competent and steady
Peaceful and agreeable
Has administrative ability
Mediates problems
Avoids conflicts
Good under pressure
Finds the easy way
The Phlegmatic As a Friend
Easy to get along with
Pleasant and enjoyable
Good listener
Dry sense of humor
Enjoys watching people
Has many friends
Has compassion and concern

I particularly like the description of the person in this description, though I am so NOT tidy
The Melancholic / Phlegmatic
The melancholic-phlegmatic is tidier, more procedural and less flexible than the phlegmatic-melancholic. He may be slower to take on new projects, as the melancholic fear of new situations and tendency to perfectionism takes over. The double-dose of introversion, along with the melancholic tendency to negativity, makes it difficult for him to give compliments and make upbeat small talk. It also causes him to instinctively say “no” when he first hears a request. Others may perceive this as “snobbishness.” Unless the melancholic-phlegmatic is very comfortable, and is surrounded by understanding long-time friends, he may find himself somewhat isolated and alone, unable to warm up in a social gathering. He is less critical and less grudge-bearing than a pure melancholic or a melancholic-choleric. However, the tendency of the melancholic to dwell on things for a long time in their mind, combined with the sensitivity of the phlegmatic toward interpersonal relationships, can result in long-lasting hurts, an erosion of self-confidence and self-esteem, and even depression. Extremely sensitive and possessing a longing for the ideal (melancholic), they are also highly attentive to what others need or desire, through their phlegmatic aspect. This makes them more than usually susceptible to anxiety and a negative self-image
This temperament combination is highly driven to succeed—not for success’ sake alone, but because their melancholic nature is drawn to high ideals, and their phlegmatic side will have a strong desire to please. Thus, they are capable of long-range planning, organization, and attention to detail that makes them excellent and conscientious scholars. They are capable of pursuing highly idealistic goals, usually with long-term academic requirements, such as attaining their doctorate. They value their friendships, but can spend many hours alone reading or studying. They may have a tendency to hypochondria or to genuine physical weaknesses, as well as a tendency to timidity and anxiety, especially about new activities or ventures.
One melancholic-phlegmatic we know is highly organized, critical, slow, and dogmatically unforgiving, yet reveals her phlegmatic aspect in her intense discomfort with confrontation (unless she is very at ease among the warring members) and in her strong relationships with her friends. You wouldn’t guess that she is so devoted to her friends, however, because true to her melancholic nature she rarely initiates contact with them – they always have to call her first. A tendency to avoid the stresses of social interaction by spending overmuch time alone—whether in scholarly pursuits or reading for relaxation—is something that melancholic-phlegmatics need to watch out for.

I am not sure what all this means ( though the phlegmatic in m would say that!!) I am becoming aware of how negatively I talk about myself and I am attempting to change that behaviour in myself. It is the spaghetti which is not cooking properly not me that is a bad chef!

According to another test I come out as a INFJ ( on the Jung Typology test)

Idealist Portrait of the Counselor (INFJ)
Counselors have an exceptionally strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others, and find great personal fulfillment interacting with people, nurturing their personal development, guiding them to realize their human potential. Although they are happy working at jobs (such as writing) that require solitude and close attention, Counselors do quite well with individuals or groups of people, provided that the personal interactions are not superficial, and that they find some quiet, private time every now and then to recharge their batteries. Counselors are both kind and positive in their handling of others; they are great listeners and seem naturally interested in helping people with their personal problems. Not usually visible leaders, Counselors prefer to work intensely with those close to them, especially on a one-to-one basis, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes.

Counselors are scarce, little more than one percent of the population, and can be hard to get to know, since they tend not to share their innermost thoughts or their powerful emotional reactions except with their loved ones. They are highly private people, with an unusually rich, complicated inner life. Friends or colleagues who have known them for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that Counselors are flighty or scattered; they value their integrity a great deal, but they have mysterious, intricately woven personalities which sometimes puzzle even them.

Counselors tend to work effectively in organizations. They value staff harmony and make every effort to help an organization run smoothly and pleasantly. They understand and use human systems creatively, and are good at consulting and cooperating with others. As employees or employers, Counselors are concerned with people's feelings and are able to act as a barometer of the feelings within the organization.

Blessed with vivid imaginations, Counselors are often seen as the most poetical of all the types, and in fact they use a lot of poetic imagery in their everyday language. Their great talent for language-both written and spoken-is usually directed toward communicating with people in a personalized way. Counselors are highly intuitive and can recognize another's emotions or intentions - good or evil - even before that person is aware of them. Counselors themselves can seldom tell how they came to read others' feelings so keenly. This extreme sensitivity to others could very well be the basis of the Counselor's remarkable ability to experience a whole array of psychic phenomena.

Mohandas Gandhi, Sidney Poitier, Eleanor Roosevelt, Jane Goodall, Emily Bronte, Sir Alec Guiness, Carl Jung, Mary Baker Eddy, Queen Noor are examples of the Counselor Idealist (INFJ).


We are what we believe we are.
C. S. Lewis

Now I am really confused. I mean the phlegmatic in me can't decide what I want to be and the melancholic will be dissatisfied anyway