Sunday, April 16, 2006

Easter Sunday

I've been having thoughts of regeneration, rebirth, a new start. I'd like to think it had something to do with spirituality but it probably has more to do with the new series of Doctor Who. I have memories of watching the old series with my sister fro m behind the sofa but there was ,I am sure, nothing quite like the Russel T Davies version. It's so wonderful having Saturday nights in with the children. A six year old and an eight year old are the best people to watch it with. Now it's their turn to watch from under the cushions!

And just for the record, David Tennant is dead good! And the impersonation of Cassandra was spot on!

So rebirth and stuff! I am having major struggles with my life. Much of it has to do with the fact that I am changing my medication, from depakote to Lamotrigine. Depakote puts weight on so I think I am using it as an excuse for having gained half a stone or more. Trouble is I have no motivation to do anything about it. What if when I've changed my meds I don't manage to lose the weight? I have got to find my motivation again. I can just about get to the gym but I just seem to put on weight rather than lose it . Reuben and I went shopping the other day. He has such good taste! but the things he chose just didn't fit. He then asked me why I wasn't a size 12 anymore. I was so depressed but it only served to make me eat more. I'm going to try to use the week after Easter to have my own restart!

I'm running in the Hawkshead trail run next week and I have at least managed to go for one long run ( and it's only taken me three days to recover!) Never mind, I only need to finish. I'll walk if I have to!

I suppose the new motivation has to be our holiday. We are going to Cornwall with some pals over Whitsun week. I'd like to be able, no willing, to wear a swimming costume and swim with the kids and so much of that depends on my confidence. I'm just not sure how I can go about improving that!!!